So here about sums up my ability to make sentences right now.
This. Trip. Is. F-ing. Awesome.
Okay, I’ll try a little harder cause it’s a blog and you people are paying good money, for your um, carmel machiatos as you read this so let me try a little harder. On a side note, anyone know a good way to get me a carmel machiato in a giant cup? Cups here are not made for americans, they are reasonably sized making ventis looks as they are: ridiculous.
I have never ever in any way shape or form had 7-days in a row like this. I cant believe it’s only been 7-days.
- beautiful * diverse * hilarious * fragile * strong * amazing *fall-in-love-free-fall-kind-of experience.
Now my intention with my blog is to make you feel like you are with me since I’m not even sure or clear on all that I’ve seen this past week, I will share with you that above all I feel joy.
Joy in a way I never have felt, because I’ve never felt alive like this before either. And friends, as you know, I live electric and loud and light…but it’s a whole other level here. Kenya, in my short time here is a land that reflects extreme’s. Extreme poverty, extreme wealth, extreme joy, extreme possibility, the safety of the middle here does not exist. I have realized how comfortable I had become in that snug familar of the middle, cause lets face it, it’s safe there. And I know where I am there. And I know who I am there. And in the land of the middle there are things like naps, and suburbs, and target, and toilets that reliably flush, and showers that are hot, and a language I undesrstand.
But guess what is not in the middle? The joy of dancing and singing with 12-sets of small hands set upon you on dirt roads, the hugs-like-you-freaking-mean it from the AYP yoga teachers who travel at times tremendous differences to teach one class, the near-death yet hilarious driving adventures on the super-highway, chanting cake! cake! cake! with your new roomates while watching strange Kenyan reality shows, an 8000 square foot space and the direction of “create,” looking into the eyes of the most beautiful people you have ever met, and listening as they tell you how they came to be where they are without one single hint or note of pity, but rather of triumph and possibility. Using my ipad as a flashlight when the power went out. Jumping up and down in a cold shower, smiling. Staring in wonder at a 300 plus lb woman named teacher happiness bellows “weeeeelcommme!!!!” to her school of 450 students where yoga is changing lives, and doing yoga on a concrete floor with them. Being a part of something that has such momentum, spirit, and soul. Evenings in a living room, and long car-rides with people who are inspiring my life to be more than it is. And oh yes…lions, and tigers, and zebras.
I had my first cry 2-monrings ago, in public of course. It was a realizing I’m not going home for a while-meets what if I fail-meets I miss my dog and friends and students-meets what the F am I doing???!?!?
So Paige, clearly used to people crying in the knowing way she’s looking at me, says “I brought you here because you know something I dont….to create that thing that neither of us know.” and so there it is…and it always has been, but I must remember.
And here’s what I know more than ever.
Living in the middle might be safe and cozy and still absolutley groundwork for transformation and change, but for the long haul? The middle is, well, lame. super lame.
I knew Africa Yoga Project was a force, enough to say an unreasonable and amazing yes to a 6-month go, but friends, what’s happening here is beyond what I even imagined possible. 52-teachers creating lives for themselves, and possibility for the thousands of students reached per week in out-reach classes (think prisons, schools, slums, etc), the AYP teaching team and staff are doing anything but living in the middle. The people I have met traveling through connected as well, nothing is an accident. I am surrounded by forces.
My mantra for this trip is and will continue to be “how can I be of service.” I have learned so much in the past week from everyone around me, and I can honestly say I havent laughed this much or this hard I think since being a kid. I like being a kid again here in Kenya. I like dancing and singing while holding as many sets of small hands as I can, while they press into mine, and look intently at the contrast, and look back up to me and smile at the difference.
So maybe there’s a difference, but no ones letting go. And no ones giving up.
May I lead with grace. May I ask with wonder. May I listen with openess. May I see the beauty in absolutley everything. May I be inspired to uncover more beauty…every day. And if too much time passes without a deep laugh, an inspired conversation with a stranger, a giant hug…may I be aware enough to seek it.
Thank you to each of you who has lifted me in your own unique and beautiful ways to be here, and to each of you here with me in Kenya inpsiring me inspiring me beyond measure, asanti…thank you.
My life is changing in ways I cant articulate yet, but I’ll keep trying. Love to you.
(this pic is with my new rockin buddy Jen, a total soul sister, I’ll start taking pictures soon!)